6 Essential Memorial Day Pool Rules

May 25, 2017

Memorial Day is right around the corner—which means that public pool owners around the nation are cleaning off their chairs, stocking their snack bars, testing their water pH levels (is that a thing still?), and getting ready for the busy season. Acne-inflicted 16-year-olds around across the country are eager to get out of their parents’ houses and into the sun to get that sought after golden glow. And you? You’re trying to figure out how you can convert your workspace into a mobile hotspot to maximize your outdoor time (don’t worry, we are too).

If you’re planning to bounce around one of Denver’s many luxury apartment facilities over the long holiday and want to do so with style and grace, we’ve got for you our top pool rules to follow. Now go forth and conquer that summer dreamin’ lifestyle.

  1. We all love Odesza, but for goodness’ sake, turn it down. Even if you’re the most talented playlist creator in the world, you have to watch the volume on your Bluetooth speakers. As much as we’ve wanted to stream sweet jams while working on our tans, we’ve also craved peace, quiet, and respite from our busy day jobs. So don’t be THAT guy or gal—it’s never a good look.
  2. Keep the beer pong/flip cup/miscellaneous drinking game at college. We get it—it bonds you—but plan to get in that quality bonding time at home and not in a shared community space.
  3. PDAs? Eh, not OK. Feel free to give your honey Give your honey bunches a smooch here and there, but excessive tanning lotion rub downs are awkward to observe and even more awkward to facilitate.
  4. Orange is the new…nope, it’s never a good idea. So please, lather on the SPF. Colorado is in a prime geographic location for sunburns—if you don’t take our word for it, you’ll soon make the discovery yourself.
  5. Jumping into the water is fine, but just say no to the cannonballs. No one past the age of 10 to 13 should be attempting these anyway, and if we’re trying to work on our tans with our laptops on hand…well, the tsunami of water is not something that we or our devices can afford.
  6. It’s grill season, and everyone wants to get their fix of the latest Marczyk-prepped sausage or other encased meat option. Hogging (pun intended) the community grill is therefore a no-no.

Do you have any other public pool etiquette notes to share?